First Shift

Today is my first actaul shift. The other three days I worked the cash register but we always had some training or something first. Today I go in, work for 4 hours and then go home. I"m so freaked out, but at the moment I feel kind of calm. Whatever happens, happens. Work sucks.lol but it's money, which I need.

Went to the college yesterday to right my english test and get a tour. I"m actaully really excited for school. It's gonna be fun.

TOROS is almost over :( My last year (Most likely) I"m glad I get to go to the mall preview on saturday, those are always so much fun :D

2nd day

well 2nd day done. Much better. I've decided with a great pep talk from my mother (who is an awesome woman btw) that I'm going to jsut suck it up and change my own attitude about work and fear. It's all in my head and I controll my head.

going to kyles house to watch canadas next top model finale. sisi better win.

First Day

Well I had my first day yesterday. It wasn't too bad. there were 5 of us one my age, one in her 20s and two older ladies. We spent the whole time practicing different price overrides on the registers and scanning things. I don't remember half of it. I have the feeling I want to quit again, but i refuse. Being a cashier is no ones idea of a great job but it's money and it's a job. I have to go back tonight, with no idea where to meet people ( The lady just vaguely answered my question when I asked the second time shes done so) i guess I'll wander around until I find them. Plus I had to leave yesterday at 7 and they weren't done so I didn't get my shirt which I 'll have to do today. gah. Deep breath. Younger people then me can do this, christ stupider people can probably do this. It'll be a learning experience either way.

I know I can do this job, but I'm still scared shitless and I don't know why, but it sucks and it hurts.

Tornado

Well this has been a crazy week. Yesterday we had a HUGE MASSIVE storm sweep through the area, with several tornados, well not officially but people ahve been reporting seeing them and I saw a HUGE funnel cloud from my window. It was pretty creepy. They've declered state of emergency in two nearby towns. It was insane.

I have a job now. I start in about an hour and a half. I am going to be a cashier at Zellers. I m scared, although I know in my head I can do it I just don't know wthat to expect which i hate. I'm sure after a week I'll be more comfortable with it and soon it'll be no big deal, but at the moment I'm freaking out about it. I've had my moments of calm though where I feel good about it. It's close, they're going to work around my TOROS and school schedule, and they have a good training program. Well I have to go. I'll post again probably tomorrow about my first day.

quickie

Well I had a job interview today at Zellers. I think it went well. I'm scared though, scared of not getting the job and scared of getting it. I'm such a screw up with most things and it takes me forever to get comfortable doing something. I'm sure it'll be fine. I have to get the job first.lol

High School Life is OVER!

Well I officially graduated from high school on thursday. YAY ME!!!!!!! it feels so weird to be done and know it's not going to ever happen again.

Grad was fun, the ceremony was a bit boring and long but hey they're supposed to be. Nobody said anything to profound although my principal urged us to mooch off of our parents as long as possible ^_^

When I arrived in the morning I also found ut I won a $1000 bursary. ^_^ Thats almost half of my tuition and probably more then I could make if I worked in the summer. I'm still looking for a job, but I don't feel so stressed out about it, that money is a big help :D

TOROS is going good, its a little boring even though we have more to learn then last year. I think part of it is because Beauty and The Beast we all knew and it was so cool to be in a show you grew up with. CATS i"ve never even heard or seen so it doesn't have the same connection, plus the chorus are put in the background an aweful lot compared to last year *Sigh* Oh well, at least i'm on stage.

Eva Cassidy

An AMAZING AMAZING Singer, who left us way to soon. Her songs (mostly covers) are beautiful . I wonder what she could have accomplished if she had been around a little longer. Gorgeous haunting voice.





singing somewhere over the rainbow a song I HATE, but when she sings it, its so damn beautiful.

Job

I realized I never posted what happened with my job. So here is a quick summary...
I went back that night for my second shift and got a grand total of 1 hour of training before he left me alone. Granted he was in the hotel( he lives ther) but still I was all alone.

Then He came back after an hour or so and was talking to me and he asked me what type of college degree i had. I SPECIFICALLY told him 3 times at least i was in my last year of high school and it says so right on my resume which he obviously didn't read. when he found out I was 17 he got alittle ansy and kept dropping it into conversations like " well don't tell the gues ts ur only 17". He was also expecting me to haggle and use marketing techniques with people on the phone. It was obvious He had paid no attention whatsoever to my resume or interview where I made it clear I had no hotel experience and not much job experience. I thought I was applying for a housekeeping job until the last interview. it was a disaster and I felt literally sick so I told him that it would be beter if I didn't work here because it was obvious he was uncomfortable with my age and I didnt' have the skills necessary. Then he made me feel like an ass for quitting.

My parents were great about it. They had been having bad feelings about the whole thing anyways. It sucks but now I"ve had that bad experience I'm ready to move on and have some good ones.

Its all over. . .

This will be short I have to leave for TOROS soon, we're doing CATS this year. Suprisingly fun.

So i finished my last High school exam...ever. I only have grad and then no more, on to college. How scary is it...frightening. I've been working on getting a job, I'm gonna really put myself out there, because damn college is expensive, not only tuition but books and in my program knives, kitchen outfit and server outfit. My parents are paying but I'd really like to contribute and eventually pay them back. I don't know how schoosl going to be next year, i'm in hotel admin but since I know that it's only a stepping stone to put myself through film school it might be hard to get through it. I will though. I promise. The cooking and serving ( the school has a restaurant on campus) is going to be the hardest, i have zero experience in both areas. My head hurts thinking about it sometimes and other times i'm excited at the challenge. I'm going to try and embrace the adventurous side of it, and the knowledge that if i buckle down there is nothing to keep me from succeeding.

I don't think I can Do this. . .

well I had my first morning at work and wow, I feel so stressed and incapable I cried. Yeah how sad is that, how many people have cried on the first day of their first job?
I thought It wouldn't be too bad but there is so much to learn, I applied for housekepping and when they offered me front desk I thought sure hey that's even better. After my first 4 hours of training I'm about to tear my hair out. There is so much I'm expected to know. I did check outs this morning and this is my only training in checkouts. Then tonight I go back for check ins and reservations. My head is spinning just trying to keep it all straight in my head. I wrote most of it down, but some of it we went through too fast and the little nuances I haven't managed to grasp yet. Im not a clever person by any means I can remember really well but to extrapolate that stuff into other areas and situations I'm not so good at. The guy who trained me ( not the one who hired me) seemed nice but i got the vibe he thought I was a little stupid, shy and slow. :( I'm gonna try and stick it out and we'll see how it goes. I'm terrified about reserving and booking and being left alone. Most likely I'll be doing night shifts 11pm-7am so I'll be mostly doing check ins for drunks, weirdos etc. I think I'll like nights once I get the hang of things. if ppl are reading this pray for me please, i'm gonna need all the support i can get. I hate being a shy person:( life is harder for us.

So Fuckin crazy weekend coming up

Well I got a job. YAY. It's at a hotel( a small one) I applied for housekeeping and ended up getting front desk. Now i'm nervous as hell. My first day is tomorrow at 7 am. If that wasn't bad enough. I audition for Cats(the drama summer school program) and I figured chorus like last year. but no today the night before my first day at work they call and tell me I'm getting a dance callback A DANCE CALLBACK! so unexpected my only dance training is 6 weeks of ballet and figure skating for 6 years( and not for like 4 since) and of course it's tomorrow during my work shift my first work shift. Although they did say i could come in sunday instead, so If my boss asks me to work sunday(so far he's only told me of my first day he hasn't given me a schedule) I'll have to say no, and if his schedule he gives me conflicts with Cats then I'll have to stop doing that which i don't want. Geez why does everything hae to happen in the same 2 day span. This is the worlds idea of a crule fucking joke and I don't think my nerves can take it!

Doctor WHo Video

I am a HUGE Doctor Who fan, and since I live in Canada we haven't gotten any of the season two episodes. CBC I'm waiting! so I found this really cute video of The Doctor and Rose mostly from the episod e Parting of Ways. its so sweet!

It's Raining It's pouring

The title refers to the weather outside, but also my mood. I've just been in a kind of depressed mood lately. granted what i considered depressed is hardly, unfortunatly(or fortunatly) I have been born with an inability to stay mad/angry and or sad for too long, i jsut find things that make me happier really easy.

I realized I never did post what happened at Regionals, and I really don't feel like going into a big long story so the short version. Our actors messed up lots (although some were superb) our lights and sounds screwed up at least twice each, our keyboard amp wasn't on, and we had several seconds of no one on stage at one point. suffice to say we didn't move on.

nothing new really in my life. Saw MI3 on opening day, sad I know but I was really excited to see it. I am not a fan of tom cruise he acts exactly the same in all movies and he didn't dissapoint here. I was more interested in how JJ Abrams would handle his first movie ( With a budget of 150 mil no less) and he totally didn't dissapoint. MI3 was totally the best of all of the movies. It's plot was followable, the characters had more depth and motivation and he understood a concept most action thrillers dont' get. It's not the thing that matters ( as evidenced by JJ's brilliant use of never telling us what the hell the Rabbit's foot is) it's the stuff that happens because of it.
All in all an awesome movie, although I'm kind of interested in seeing how JJ handles the new Star Trek movie, I'm nto a trekkie but i like star trek and he could be the boost the series needs and by that time he'll be older, more experienced and i have a feeling it will be amazing.
oh and Jonathan Rhys Meyers who i've had a celebrity crush on since Bend it Like Beckham is in it YAY! and with pretty muscles now. yum.he Too bad there wasn't more of him.

Whats there to say really

Well last night we performed at Regionals and suffice to say...it was a complete and utter disaster. THis is jsut a short post to get my frustrations out before I head over to teh school for our private ajudication and workshops. Neither of which I 'm looking forwards to. In workshops I'm with no one I know and I have a VERY hard time talking to strangers, it's just not something I can really do.

Gah I Must go. I'll post the whole story later. When I feel less depressed.

Wildcard

Well we got wildcard for the regionals so we perform again this thursday. I"m so out of my groove though, tuesday will be my first time doing sound in 2 and a half weeks. I'm sure I'll get right back into it with no problem but still, it sucks. Regionals are going to be tons of fun theres lots of workshops and events to go to and I get to see Emily since her school made it too. YAY!

Neverending White Lights

Well I finally bought the Neverending WHite Light's cd. SO good!!!!!!!!!! I don't know how many people have seen the movie Kontroll but this cd reminds me of it for some reason. And i LOVED Kontroll. Daniel Victor is a genius seriously. I especially love the song From what I once was, which is the only song he sings on and its beautiful haunting really.



I also bought the movie Pride and Prejudice with Keria Knightley. It was so sweet, I'm not a romantic movie person, but this one was impossible not to like. I've read the book so I knew what was going to happen but watching it I just got caught up in the movie. Keira Knightley deserved that Oscar Nom, she was amazing, and Matthew MacFadyen was so . . . heartbreaking as Mr. Darcy. Brilliant Movie.!

Sears is over

Well the Sears Drama Festival is over. We didn't do too bad I must say. A few mistakes but overall I'm proud of what we accomplished. This play was almost completely a student production ( with Mr. W, and Mrs. B helping us out with the beaucratic stuff). We didn't win but the two plays that did were AMAZING. This year everyone stepped up their game. I'm sad that I wasn't on stage but it was interesting being up in the booth.

In the end we did win some awards though.

Stage managers award ( EXTREMELY well deserved)
Awards of merit for
costume management
set design
acting

Awards of excellence for
playwriting
ensemble acting.

Who knows we might be a wildcard and then it's off to Regionals! But if not this was an incredible experience and as tough and hard as it was I had fun and wouldnt' trade it for anything.

I Want To Be Your Canary - World Premiere

So tomorrow is the world premiere of the tragedy I Want to Be your Canary, written, directed by and starring Spenser with support from the Masqueraiders. I myself am only a "Lowly" Techie. I am the sound operator and I must say my sounds kick ass, unfortunatly this is my first time behind the sound board for a production so I'm a little unexperienced but I'm sure I'll do fine. I feel kinda sad cuz at last Sears Festival I was onstage(Not to boost but I even won an award) and that is where I feel most comfertable. Not making the play this year and last hurt...alot. Especially this year when I knew going into it i wasn't going to be cast because the roles had mostly been cast already in Spensers mind (not truly his fault it's hard not to do) but I nailed my audition and was better then several people in it. But some where better then me so Hey, being a techie wasn't a bad experience. I have a new found respect for them, but I stil prefer film to theatre and If i'm doing theatre being onstage rather then off. Sucks for me I don't have thhe typical "pretty look" most female roles in my schools plays seem to require. *Sigh* oh well...tomorrow we perform for the school, Thrusday Sears. I think we have a shot of making it to regionals. It is really a good play. IF we can manage to be under time.

Office Avatars

The Office!

A video from Youtube that celebrates one of the smartest cleverest most awesomest half hour shows on tv. Steve Carrel is HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And Pam and JIm...awwwwwwwww. Hilarious mockumentary everyone should watch!